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I have start this article with a very powerful question that really makes me think. “Do you want to be loved?” I can not imagine there are many people who will answer in the negative, whether they are conscious of it or not. But do we need to wait for someone else to come around and love us before we can love ourselves? The challenge for many people is that when they look at their lives, they see nothing worth loving. But if you look deeper, there is something worthy in all our lives—something that deserves our attention and care even more than others tend to give themselves credit for. There is something in us that can be counted on to grow and change, no matter what obstacles we encounter along the way. If we learn to love ourselves, we can make choices that enable us to find our way through all the challenges that life brings. By cultivating true self-love, you will be able to pinpoint your true potential and create the life of your dreams. I have known for a long time that there are many people who do not know how to love themselves, which makes them completely dependent on others or on their circumstances for happiness. We all want to be loved by the ones we love, but there are times when people put us in a position where we cannot love them back. When my spouse leaves me, I have to pick myself up off the ground. I have to learn how to be happy again. If I continue being angry, feeling hurt or resentful for years or decades after my ordeal with divorce, then I am not able to really start living again. Without love, life is just surviving day by day with no sense of purpose or direction. We have three basic needs in order to live a good life. We need to feel loved by someone, we need to learn how to love ourselves, and we need to get our feelings out in the open and get them acknowledged by others. I like this quote from Abraham Lincoln:“Most people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be.” When you know how to love yourself, you will be more capable of attracting and keeping a romantic relationship because you will not lose yourself in your bond with another person. This is one of the reasons that many women fall into relationships with abusive men. They believe that they can never deserve anything good in life, and they do not know how to love themselves. In abusive relationships, love is expressed in a controlling or manipulative manner. A woman who does not truly love herself will often seek out a man who treats her in a demeaning manner because she feels she has no other choice. If this situation sounds familiar to you, I am urging you to reflect on it and find ways to change your thinking. You can learn how to love yourself and change your relationship with yourself and the world around you. One of the most important things that we need to learn is how to stand up for ourselves. It can be hard when we have been taught from an early age that it is wrong or selfish to love ourselves too strongly. cfa1e77820